3 Ways to Repair a Relationship Ruined by Gossip

July 18, 2016 1502 Comments

Ahhh, celebrity gossip. We love to peek into the lives of the rich and famous, and often forget most of it is hurtful lies. Take the recent frenzy into whether Jennifer Aniston is pregnant and her kick ass response to the hurtful statements that gossip can bring.

What about closer to home? How often are you (and I) guilty of gossip about people we supposedly care for?

For example, you were upset, you said some things you shouldn’t have, and your best girlfriend caught wind of the gossip and now refuses to talk to you. You’ve been in fights with others over your lifetime, but this one you surely don’t know how to handle.

Don’t fret: here are three ways to repair a relationship when your friend hears you gossip about her.

1. Be Honest

You’ve been caught red-handed doing something very bad, but the worst thing you can do in this terrible situation is be dishonest and try to cover up the mess with lies. Instead swallow your pride and fess-up, darling.

But be sure to let your girlfriend know how sorry you are, which definitely involves the words “I’m sorry,” maybe more than once, but don't end it there. Tell her why you were gossiping in the first place and explain what, exactly, had upset you that had caused the "friend crime."

2. Don't stop trying

Chances are your friend isn’t going to forgive you right away. But remain calm: if this friendship has good roots, she will forgive you eventually. She may just want to see you suffer a bit first (which you surely deserve).

Take this cold-shoulder, silent-treatment period as an opportunity to show your friend just how much you care about your relationship.

Call, text, email, write. Don't give up. If you need some friend-forgiveness inspiration, think Miranda and Carrie’s breakup in Sex and the City Movie 1. Be Miranda, and yes, wait in the cab “17 dollars long” if need be.

3. Come bearing gifts

If you can’t get through to your wounded girlfriend with your frequent attempts at communication, it may be time to show up on her doorstep bearing gifts. A bouquet of flowers, a bottle of her favourite lotion, a BIG sorry note, and perhaps some additional goodies you know are her favourite treats - chocolates? champagne? jewelry or shoes?

She might just crack up laughing with these black flip flops when she reads the quote on the insole – “I believe in hard labor, my fingers lift precious rocks all day” – which will only help your forgiveness cause.

Undertake this period of forgiveness and perhaps you'll be even better friends before you know it. We know you’re a good friend at heart, and surely you’ve learned your lesson.

Gossiping can get the best of us sometimes, but don't let it be the last act of your best friendship.

Has this happened to you? What did you do to make things right? Share with us in the comments below.

Mercy Ama

October 21, 2020

So educating

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